Not So Heavenly

I ain’t gonna lie.


On a clear day, the views of Lake Tahoe from Heavenly are spectacular, but that doesn’t make up for the fact that Heavenly is horrible mountain.

I hate Heavenly.

I thought I didn’t give it a fair chance in 2007 so I visited again this past weekend. Big mistake. This trip just reinforced my hatred.


On Friday, about 75% of the mountain was closed due to high winds. I know I can’t fault the mountain for high winds, but give me a fucking break. The highest lift (CA side) we were able to take was Powderbowl, thus we were basically confined to a small area the same size as the West side of Mt. High!! Good thing Henry and I both have Epic Passes because if we had paid full price, we would have been PISSED.

Saturday was A LOT better, but only because there was a foot of new pow. The weather conditions in the morning were basically the same as Friday and yet most of the lifts were actually open. I just don’t get it. Anyway, we had a really good time on the Nevada side. We went down some nice tree runs below the Stagecoach lift and I didn’t even mind the skier tracked pow because it was soft enough to carve through.

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After a quick lunch at East Peak Lodge, we wanted to go to the top of the mountain so we went up Dipper Express and made our way to Sky Express. As we were about to get in line for Sky, the staff announced that they were closing the lift. WTF, seriously? Sky being closed meant that we were stuck on the California side AGAIN. This is exactly why I hate┬áHeavenly so much; it truly is a bitch to traverse the different areas. From NV to CA, you have to take a few lifts and you can bet your ass that there will be catwalks involved. From CA to NV, you better pray to the Heavenly Gods to keep Sky open, otherwise, just forget about it – YOU’RE STUCK!

Can’t take this guy anywhere

AND why is it that Heavenly doesn’t rope off areas that don’t lead directly back to runs? We went down into the trees off of Cat Track (CA side), got stuck in more than knee deep powder and had to hike over a snow covered trench and up to Maggie’s run! Damnit!

I’m usually sad when snowboarding trips end, but I was eager to leave Tahoe on Sunday. Since it had been snowing, we spent the morning shoveling snow and putting on chains. I had been checking the road conditions since the night before and decided that taking the 50 would be the best way home (instead of the 395) because chains were required for a shorter distance.

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Our drive home started innocently enough. It was snowing, but we had chains on so we were fine. After driving a mile down the street, we came to a complete stop. I kept checking the road conditions for the 50 to see what the deal was, but there was no mention of any accidents or road closures. And because we were slowly inching along (no joke, 9 miles in 4 hours), we stayed put. After 5 hours or so, it was finally announced that there was a traffic hold for avalanche control. I seriously wanted to punch something!!! It was so fucking frustrating to realize that not only did we waste 5 hours FOR NOTHING, we still had a good 10 hour drive ahead of us.

I just want to go home!!

So we back tracked on the 50, took off the chains and headed to the 395. This began the scariest drive of our lives.


We just couldn’t catch a break. We were constantly battling Mother Nature whether it was snow and zero visibility or heavy rain and high winds. After 15 hours of HELL, we were finally home.

So yea, Henry and I won’t be coming back to Tahoe anytime soon, that’s for sure.

To end on a good note, check out what we made for dinner: juicy lucy with pepper jack and caramelized onions. So damn good!

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